s5 (s5) wrote,

I don't believe in conspiracy theories, but

What happens to the millions of Free Art Tests collected every year by the Art Instruction Schools? Are they mostly filed away or discarded, providing little more than a brief moment of amusement for late night TV addicts?

Or is there something more sinister at work? After all, what do we really know about this "Art Instruction Schools"? How have they managed to survive for so many decades without any visible contribution to the world of art (or civilization itself)?

What if this "AIS" isn't actually an art school, but, instead, is a front for a government program that profiles all Americans through these "Free Art Tests", and, depending on their profile, either kidnaps suspected enemies of the state and prosecutes them in secret tribunals, or trains them as CIA operatives like Matt Damon in the Bourne Identity?

If this were really happening, wouldn't you want to know?

Thousands of children and adults go missing every year, many of them with artistic talent. If they were being kidnapped by our government and sent away with black hoods over their heads to be locked away in the basement of this shadowy pentagonal building:

wouldn't you want to know?

I just ordered my art test, and in two weeks, I'll know for certain.

And speaking of the holidays, it looks like we're really going to make the UnTurkey after all. We have several pounds of gluten powder, and thanks to a trip to the Asian grocery in Daly City (where fake animals live side by side with the real animals), we now have fake skin! Pics will be posted at unturkey.org as we attempt to assemble this multi-day cooking concoction. Hopefully it will be yummy. And if it's not, we can always unthaw the Crispy Chicken Mac Nugget from the same freezer case as our xmas feast.
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